"When the words stop..."

"When the words stop,
and you can endure 
the silence
that
reveals your heart's pain
of emptiness,
or that great wrenching-sweet longing,
then, 
that is the time to..."
~Hafiz


the words
have stopped
and in their absence,
I feel frantic for their return.

I remember
when our daughter thought she
was old enough to
say "no"

she thought she could
run away
to her house of 
sticks and branches
in 
the back yard,
eat
marshmallows
for breakfast,
stay up until the stars fell asleep,
and
wear her pajamas
to school...

backpack
filled with crayons and
a party dress,
she straightened her
shoulders,
tossed her ponytail
and let the
screen door
slam
for punctuation

I wondered if the
silence of
twilight 
would bring her
home to me...

but it didn't

I wondered if the rustle of
leaves,
the caw of a crow,
the soft mewing of the
neighbor's cat
would
pull her towards me...

but it didn't

I wondered if
the scent of cinnamon and
sage,
apple cider and
smoke curling from the
gently tilting
chimney would 
call her to the
soft light of home --
like a
moth to a
candle...

but it didn't

finally
it called me
to her...

and there she sat
in the dusky silence
eyes closed,
stroking
a small blue feather
between her fingers

"hi mommy,"
she said.

"do you think
bluebirds are invisible
in the almost light
of dinnertime?"

sometimes the
questions of the heart,
silence
the call of
things...

"When the
words stop...
then,
that is the time to try
and listen
to what the Beloved's eyes
most want
to
say."
~ibid.